Finding Relief in Change
I've been doing a lot of reflecting the past two weeks on my first year of college. A lot has changed; most of that change being new and unexpected. I know you think you have it figured out, but you don’t. I mean that in the most exciting way.
I came into this year thinking I had it all figured out—I knew who I would be hanging out with and what I would be doing on the weekends—but turns out I had no idea that I would meet my best friends come second semester, find a creative community where I’ve also found growth, and learn to care more about myself the way I used to care about others in my place.
The thing that has become most transparent to me so far this year is this — life does not work out how you plan it your head, in fact it usually works out in the complete opposite way. I’ve found that this can be a really really good thing or a really really hard thing to comprehend. The unexpected has made appearances that have left me speechless and confused, yet comforted and content. It could take 3 days to 3 years to figure out why it happened the way it did, but what a relief it is to stand truth in the face only to find out that it was supposed to happen this way all along.
I think it's gotten too easy to plan every little detail out in your head and to feel such a disappointment when that plan does a 180, yelling a big fat "NOPE" right in your face. I've faced the wrath of what I want to happen verses what is actually going to happen, and let me tell you it is not a fun thing to come to terms with.
With all of this is mind, I think it's important to face the now and find all the beauty in it. Even if the now is not how you had pictured it. I’m giddy and impatient as I close the book on my freshman year of college, but I feel ready for more of the unexpected.